A room of my own

It was Virginia Wolf who said that a woman must have a room of her own if she is to write fiction.  Virginia’s statement was a Feminist one, mine, to be honest, is more practical.  I have found that I need my own personal space, a room of my own so to speak, to truly relax and to indulge in a bit of blog writing.

I have been quiet on the blog front recently.  This wasn’t an intentional blogging holiday, just a bit of a cool down because there has been loads of other stuff going on.  The builders have been in the flat installing a heating system, knocking down a couple of walls and installing a new kitchen and bathroom.  We moved out of the flat for a month and have been living with my parents. 

room of my own

Parents are great, or at least my parents are great, but when you are 36 years of age, left home nearly two decades ago and have been used to independent living, suddenly being thrust back with your parents is less than ideal. 

It hasn’t been great for them either.  Cygnet and I make a noise and a mess.  We get up early.  We often wake in the night.  We have our own little routine and it is not very flexible. 

My parents and I have been standing on each other’s metaphorical toes.  We have been disrupting each other’s routines. I know that aged 36, I need a room of my own. 

So, now that we are back in our home, the Tesco shop has been delivered, the nightly clothes wash is on, we now have a dishwasher which makes my washing-up chores easier.   I can linger in the bath, eat and drink what I like, and once Cygnet is in bed I can wander around the flat in my underwear listening to my podcasts

I am no Virginia Wolf and I have different Feminist battles to fight but in this room of my own I can pour myself a glass of wine and get back on the blogging bandwagon. 

I feel like it has been a long time. I have missed you. 

Motherhood The Real Deal

Island Living 365

My Random Musings


  1. September 12, 2017 / 12:48 pm

    I love this! I have read Virginia Wolf and I remember that quote from her. I am the same way as you though. I need a room of my own because I just need my own space. I am 40 and can’t even imagine having to move back in with any parents. I hated sharing space with my ex’s parents too. I just really need my own space and yes, to be able to walk around in my underwear or take a bath at midnight just because is absolutely ideal:) #mg
    Michelle Kellogg recently posted…Rockin’ Quote #34: Know When to Walk AwayMy Profile

    • thesingleswan
      September 12, 2017 / 9:12 pm

      Hi Michelle,

      Thank you for your comment. I cannot imagine staying with my ex’s mother. Jeeez. An afternoon was more than enough. Pen x

    • thesingleswan
      September 12, 2017 / 9:09 pm

      It is indeed Alana. Thanks for your comment. Pen x

  2. September 14, 2017 / 8:43 am

    Sounds heavenly, you definitely all need some space to relax. Whenever my Mum visits I know she finds it hard trying not to wake the children up and just be herself. #coolmumclub

    • thesingleswan
      September 14, 2017 / 8:59 pm

      Absolutely. Pen x

  3. September 14, 2017 / 9:42 am

    This post is so good! As a blogger and a woman and also someone who has moved back home with parents, with children in tow I completely get what you are saying here! We do need that space and to walk around in our underwear! #mg
    Mackenzie Glanville recently posted…stepping out of my comfort zoneMy Profile

    • thesingleswan
      September 14, 2017 / 8:58 pm

      Thanks Mac. Pen x

  4. September 14, 2017 / 1:21 pm

    I totally get this. I remember having to move back in with my dad when I was an adult and it was really hard…but I can imagine much harder with a child in the mix. I’m so happy for you that you can now walk around in your underwear listening to podcasts against amongst other things – woohoo! Thanks for linking up to #coolmumclub xoxo

    • thesingleswan
      September 14, 2017 / 8:58 pm

      Thanks Talya. Pen x

  5. September 14, 2017 / 7:49 pm

    I’ve recently separated and so I’ve had to use my Mum’s as a hotel quite often over the last couple of months, especially if I have my little ember in tow, and so I can feel your pain! It’s so strange as I’ve been turning to my Mum for comfort and it’s been lovely, but as soon as I was back under her roof, I felt like a teenager again. So much nagging (mainly about me being on my tablet writing my blogs!). I will be glad to find a place of my own again!

    • thesingleswan
      September 14, 2017 / 8:57 pm

      Absolutely agree. I need my parents for emotional support and we are the best of friends, but when we live together and try to merge our routines life just gets a bit difficult. Thanks for your comment. Take care. Pen x

    • thesingleswan
      September 15, 2017 / 9:54 pm

      Thanks Claire. Pen x

  6. September 15, 2017 / 9:35 am

    Ahhh, welcome back! I love having my blog as it is my own space. I find that if I ever go back home then I retreat to acting like that petulant teenager I once was again! #FridayFrolics

    • thesingleswan
      September 15, 2017 / 9:54 pm

      Yes, that’s it. I am petulant, sulky and constantly act like I am premenstrual – shameful really. Pen x

  7. September 15, 2017 / 1:37 pm

    Can totally relate to needing a room for blogging and space and eating chocolate! Love your blog photo, makes me want to start a log fire and cosy up. Also love the mug jacket! I want one! #fridayfrolics

    • thesingleswan
      September 15, 2017 / 9:53 pm

      Thank you. Pen x.

    • thesingleswan
      September 15, 2017 / 9:53 pm

      Thanks Debbie. Pen x

  8. September 17, 2017 / 8:18 pm

    My parents have been away for 2 weeks and I have been staying in their house “dog-sitting” for them, this has been hard enough and they haven’t even been here, I can’t imagine how hard it would be if they were here too!
    Thanks so much for linking up at #kcacols. Hope you come back again next time.
    Amy recently posted…What to buy a 9 year old girl?!My Profile

    • thesingleswan
      September 17, 2017 / 8:53 pm

      Thanks Amy, dog sitting actually sounds like quite hard work. Pen x

  9. September 18, 2017 / 10:48 am

    Welcome back! I totally understand what you mean with this – I love visiting my parents (they live a long way from us so we always have to stay over when we visit) but it can be hard to make out routines match up sometimes! Haha #mg
    Lucy At Home recently posted…Blogcrush Week 31 – 15th September 2017My Profile

    • thesingleswan
      September 18, 2017 / 8:56 pm

      It’s exactly that, thanks Lucy. Pen x

    • thesingleswan
      September 18, 2017 / 8:55 pm

      Thank you. Pen x

  10. September 19, 2017 / 4:26 am

    This is so true and yet hard to admit – that it is difficult to get back with your parents even if it is for a short while. The comfort of your own home is incomparable. Accommodating the needs of a small baby with those of an elderly couple is the hardest balancing act of all.
    Obsessivemom recently posted…Parents’ guide to basic vocabularyMy Profile

    • thesingleswan
      September 19, 2017 / 9:23 pm

      Absolutely true. thanks for your comment. Pen x

  11. September 19, 2017 / 3:43 pm

    I definitely need a room too! Sometimes I sneek off into the dining room with the laptop but that’s very rare! You’re lucky to have a whole room #KCACOLS
    Amie recently posted…Our Marvellous Monday!My Profile

    • thesingleswan
      September 19, 2017 / 9:21 pm

      haha, yes, you are right, I am very lucky. When Cygnet is at his dad’s I have the whole flat! Pen x

    • thesingleswan
      September 21, 2017 / 9:09 pm

      Ah yes, you definitely need at least a desk. Take care. Pen x

    • thesingleswan
      September 21, 2017 / 9:02 pm

      My pleasure. Pen x

  12. September 21, 2017 / 8:24 pm

    I’m 35 and I k ow I couldn’t live with my parents again. Glad they were there to help you out while the builders were in. Thanks so much for linking up at #KCACOLS. Hope you come back again next time
    Bread // Queer Little Family recently posted…Poetry: I SayMy Profile

    • thesingleswan
      September 21, 2017 / 8:48 pm

      Thank you. Pen x

  13. September 27, 2017 / 6:46 pm

    I don’t think I could go back to living with my parents. I love them and all, but it’s good to have a little distance between us lol.

    • thesingleswan
      September 27, 2017 / 9:00 pm

      I agree. I think it’s tough for them too though. We all need our own personal space. Pen x

    • thesingleswan
      September 30, 2017 / 10:00 pm

      Thanks Pen x

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