– in the spirit of fairness

Min from Single Mum Speaks  (if you haven’t read her blog before, put her on your favourites list, she has a really refreshing and witty writing style) left a comment on my post suggesting that may not have been such an original idea.  Apparently Charlotte from Sex And The City came up with a similar idea for which the tagline was:

‘One woman’s trash is another woman’s treasure’

Now that is a good tagline!  Much better than:

“for all of those ex boyfriends and girlfriends out there who are right for someone…just not us”.

You have to agree. Charlotte from SATC wins hands down! 

And then I typed in “one woman’s trash is another woman’s treasure” into Google and just look what Google returned.  Go on, click on it, this is great!

So, it turns out that when Charlotte from SATC came up with this idea, she hadn’t had an original idea either.  There are no new ideas, just recycled ones!

Anyway, I digress.  In the spirit of fairness, I thought I would write a profile for myself, but written by my ex. Well not actually written by my ex, because that would involve telling him about this blog and I am not going to do that!  This profile is written from my ex’s point of view.  This is what I think he would say about me.

Key details for your ex:

Name: Pen

Age: A decade older than she wants to be.

Height: Quite tall

Build: Slight (and a little insecure about it – she’d like to have some curves)

Hair colour: Mouse (okay naturally mouse, blonde when she has been to the hairdressers, two tone with horrendous roots when she hasn’t)

Eyes: Blue

Describe your ex in 5 words:

Quiet:  Pen is an introvert.  I have often tried to encourage her to be a bit more extrovert. I’d love to go out with someone who is the life and soul of the party.  Pen isn’t.

Creative:  Pen loves art and painting.  I am not a great fan of what she paints because it is bright and a bit too abstract for my liking, but she is quite talented.

Intelligent:  Although I wish Pen was a bit more into WW1 history.

Feminist:  Pen is all about equality of the sexes.  I don’t know what to say about this really other than you can’t have it all. Pen hasn’t realised this yet, or if she has, she won’t admit it.

Naive:  Pen thinks that the most important thing in life is to be happy.  What Pen doesn’t recognise is that you need money to be happy. 

WLTM: Describe what your ex is looking for in life and in a partner:

I don’t know.  I don’t think she will ever find someone.  She is chasing after a dream that does not and cannot exist.

Health warnings:  There is someone out there for everyone, but we all like to know what we are letting ourselves in for.  What health warnings does your ex come with?

Pen is not a very good communicator.  She doesn’t offer up information.  This means that you never know what is going on inside her head.  She is a mystery.  (Jeez, he only had to ask once in a while!)

She doesn’t look as good as she did a few years ago…

She is still breastfeeding, so you will have to share her body with my child.

She is decorating her flat just the way she wants it.  It is a bit quirky and not to everyone’s tastes.  I doubt she will want to compromise on some of her picture hanging philosophies (too right I won’t,  my picture hanging artistry has only just been unleashed!)

Oh, and just in case you fancied listening to Bobbie Roy’s One Woman’s Trash again, here it is:

Heheee.  Man I love this!  Thanks Min for writing a comment that made me type “one woman’s trash is another woman’s treasure” into Google.  

My Kid Doesn't Poop Rainbows
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  1. October 12, 2015 / 9:12 pm

    Yay! Thank you for my shout-out. I haven’t watched the video yet as, like you, I’m still breastfeeding and Piglet is latched on while I try to get him (back) to sleep so can’t risk any noise or all hell will break loose. Will make sure I watch it later. Great post as always. X
    Min recently posted…Why we should never go to cafesMy Profile

    • thesingleswan
      October 12, 2015 / 9:47 pm

      THank you! And hats off for still breastfeeding a 14 month old. Still breastfeeding my 14 month old, but it is beginning to feel like something to keep secret now that he is getting older and probably doesn’t need it anymore. Oh well, he enjoys it and so do I so we’ll carry on for a bit. Enjoyed why we should never go to cafes by the way. 😉

  2. October 13, 2015 / 12:58 am

    Brilliant! I’m sure you are going to be someone’s treasure again someday but never past nor present nor future anyone’s trash 😉 I too am a horrible introvert but I still found someone in my late 30’s.
    Trista,Domesticated Momster recently posted…~Favorite Quote #23~My Profile

    • thesingleswan
      October 16, 2015 / 8:51 pm

      Hey Trista,

      thanks for your comment and I am really glad you met someone in your late 30s. I am not sure that I want to meet someone at the moment. I am keen to be just me and focus on Cignet for a bit. x

  3. October 13, 2015 / 5:59 pm

    I would love to hear what my ex would suggest about me. It would probably be somewhere along the lines of “That bitch left me to bleed in my mother’s basement” Because that’s where I sent him off to when I broke up with him. #fartglitter💞
    The Housewife recently posted…Teenage Dating ~ Why Doesn’t My Mother Like You?My Profile

    • thesingleswan
      October 16, 2015 / 8:48 pm

      Oh dear, yes, maybe don’t let him write a dating profile for you.

    • thesingleswan
      October 16, 2015 / 8:46 pm

      Hmmm, very wise. thanks for your comment.

  4. October 14, 2015 / 5:51 pm

    There’s something about your blog. It’s so quirky and well-written I get excited when you have a new post out. Well you certainly sound like an enigma ha ha.

    And I HATE to agree with your ex on this (or anything quite honestly after how you’ve described him) but…I have a love/hate relationship with the phrase ‘money can’t buy you happiness’. I don’t agree that you ‘need’ money to be happy but frankly, unless one lives in a commune or somewhere in the jungle, it’s rather a necessity and the not having of money sure can lead to misery!
    Thanks for linking to #BabyBrainMonday. Hope to see you again.
    absolutely prabulous recently posted…BabyBrainMonday #14My Profile

    • thesingleswan
      October 16, 2015 / 8:45 pm

      Hi, I am so glad you get excited when I have a new post out. That is really great to hear! I love your blog too.

      You are right about the money thing. Everyone needs enough, but there is a difference between having just enough and letting it rule your life. Thanks for hosting #BabyBrainMonday.

  5. October 15, 2015 / 12:32 am

    Well no one can say you don’t play fair! Love the tongue in cheek tone to this 🙂 Here’s to hoping that an eligible batchelor happens to spot this post 😉
    Thanks for linking up to #AnythingGoes
    Random Musings recently posted…Book Review: Trust Your Eyes By Linwood BarclayMy Profile

    • thesingleswan
      October 16, 2015 / 8:42 pm

      Hi Debbie,

      Thanks for reading again and for your comment. Did you like the soundtrack? #AnythingGoes

  6. November 20, 2016 / 9:59 am

    “I don’t know. I don’t think she will ever find someone. She is chasing after a dream that does not and cannot exist.” That line made me shudder because it took me to a wanker of an ex and that is what he used to say to me all of the time. I have a feeling that if I ever met your ex then we would not get on at all! Brilliant post as always #KCACOLS
    Emma recently posted…The Mother Feminist with Jess from Mrs Helicopter WritesMy Profile

    • thesingleswan
      November 20, 2016 / 8:20 pm

      Hi Emma,

      Thanks for your comment. I really appreciate it. I hope that you wouldn’t get on with my ex. Most people who don’t know him very well do get on with him I think. He is charm personified. I am glad you don’t think you’d get on with my ex. It makes me think that we would get on very well. Pen x

  7. November 21, 2016 / 12:06 pm

    I bet an eligible single is reading this right now and thinks you sound amazing. Perhaps we should all try and do this for ourselves at least once! Thanks so much for linking up at #KCACOLS. Hope you come back again next Sunday
    Sharon Parry recently posted…18 things you can do at 18 (Part 2)My Profile

    • thesingleswan
      November 24, 2016 / 9:29 pm

      Ah, that’s a lovely thing to say, thanks Sharon. Pen x

  8. November 24, 2016 / 10:45 pm

    It sounds like your ex has been (would be) quite kind about you. I dread to think what my exes would have to say about me!! But I do like your / one man’s trash concept! Very funny! #KCACOLS

    • thesingleswan
      November 30, 2016 / 9:34 pm

      thank you. Pen x

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