I quite like the idea of having a theme, or one word, which sums up my New Year’s resolutions.  My word for 2016 was ‘consolidation’.   After what was, for me, a pretty shitty 2015 full of apocalyptic life changes, I wanted a year of no change.  I wanted a year of consolidation. My resolutions were all about consolidating my new beginnings from 2015 and settling into my and Cygnet’s new life.  All in all, 2016 was a pretty good…

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January 1st always used to bring a great deal of pressure with it.  On the day when my resolutions to eat healthily, to drink less, to be more productive and to be more sensible with my money were supposed to start, I invariably had a stinking hangover which could only be cured by a full english breakfast and paracetamol rinsed down with a vodka, lime and soda.  At around 3pm, when I finally emerged permanently from under my duvet, I…

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We all had a plan, possibly quite a vague plan, but a plan nonetheless.   I had planned to have a nice house, a stable job, a happy relationship, a marriage, two healthy and happy children.   Then real life happened. I have many of those things.  I have a nice flat.  I have a stable job.  I have a happy relationship (with myself, but lets not underestimate the importance of being happy in our own company).  I have a healthy…

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I haven’t written about co-parenting recently.  I’d like to be able to report that all is going swimmingly, that we are working well together and that we are doing what is best for our child.  That’s the goal obviously, but then this is real life, and as we all know, real life doesn’t like to follow a smooth path. Real life seems to object to a plan. It’s been nearly two years since we separated and we have been living…

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I’m feeling contemplative, reflective, pensive, and maybe just a tiny bit morose.  Carole King’s masterpiece, So Far Away, is playing. It is one of my favourite songs.  I am on my second glass of a heavy red wine. “You’re so far away.  Doesn’t anybody stay in one place any more ? It would be so fine to see your face at my door.”  The lyrics make me remember the good times. For me, So Far Away is not just about…

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This was supposed to be an optimistic post. I was going to try to reassure you that all will be okay even though Donald Trump has just been voted into the White House in the United States presidential elections.  I have been trying to reassure myself.  I woke at 5:40am GMT on Wednesday 9 November.  Trump’s victory was certain, if not secured, and I felt sick.  I felt sick to the pit of my stomach.  I still do. Since then,…

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Cygnet:  “Mama wee wee red” Me: no reply Cygnet: “What’s that?”    Me: pause Cygnet:  “What’s that Mama?” Me: Sigh, “It’s Mama’s” Cygnet: “What is it? “ Me: Sigh, “It’s a tampon sweetheart, it’s Mama’s” Cygnet: “tampon” Cygnet: “Mama did a noisy bottom” Me: “Thank you sweetheart” Cygnet:  “Mama done a poo” Me: “No, Mama’s not done a poo, Mama’s done a wee wee”. Me:  “ Cygnet put the toilet brush down”   “Put the toilet brush down” “LEAVE IT”…

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Two thoughts enter my head every time I see my ex which, unfortunately, because we are in a ‘co-parenting relationship’ is at least twice a week.  These are: Thank God I am not married to this man.  In 6 years that we were together, yes, you read that correctly, we were together for 6 years, how on earth did I not see what an a******e he really is?  Now that I am back on the dating scene again I am…

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One of the few advantages of co-parenting, and trust me when I tell you that there are not many, is that two nights a week when Cygnet stays with his Dad I can go out without having to fork out for a babysitter. In reality, I work late on one of those nights and by the time I finish work I am too tired to do anything other than sit on the sofa and drink wine.  On the other night,…

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I have learned quite a lot about the relationship between a mother and her son.  I have also learned quite a lot about the impact the relationship between a mother and her son has on the son’s relationship with his partner.  It is for this reason that I think you should marry a man who loves his mother. It is often said that how a man treats his mother is an indicator of how he will treat his wife.  …

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