Today CBeebies did most of the parenting.  Tonight will be white wine and self-loathing served in front of some inane rubbish on the TV – Made in Chelsea should do the trick.  It’s okay to be a crap parent sometimes.  Tomorrow will be a better day.  This is not how parenting is supposed to go.  Super-Nanny would have condemned me for finally giving into the tantrum and for buying The Octonauts magazine.  I condemn myself for my inconsistency.  If I…

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Our co-parenting relationship is currently on an even keel.  My ex is sticking to the schedule.  The constant requests to change plans have abated.  The barrage of angry emails and text messages has finished.  Our handovers are amicable and efficient.  We will never be best friends, but we are able to present a united and respectful front when Cygnet is around.  It has taken a long time to get here.  These are my tips for communicating with an ex when…

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My phone vibrates in my pocket.  It’s a notification from Bumble, the Tinder-style dating app where women message first, “you have a new connection”.  The dopamine hit lasts a mere millisecond.  I am not the first to talk about Tamagotchi dating.  Internet dating is like trying to keep a Tamagotchi alive. I open up the match to find that Andrew* has three photos (of which two are clearly selfies) and has stated that he is 6’2” in his bio.  Nothing…

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This week I read about Eileen Carey, CEO and co-founder of Glass-breakers, a silicon Valley-based software company, who dyes her blonde hair brown so that her co-workers will take her more seriously.  By dying her hair brown, she found that she looked older and felt that she was less likely to be seen and characterised in a sexual way.  She stopped wearing high heals, stopped wearing contact lenses in favour of glasses and started wearing gender neutral clothing.  She found that her colleagues…

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It was a Tuesday evening at around 9pm when my anxiety took hold on the London Underground.  It had been a long day.  Cygnet was with his father and I had stayed late at work.  I sat down next to the window and stared into the distance. I got on the train at Leicester Square in central London. A man got on at the next stop.  He was lugging a heavy cello case.  He sat down opposite me and next…

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The last couple of weeks have definitely felt like autumn.  I have put away my summer dresses, my wedged shoes and I have given up on the bottle of St Tropez fake tan in favour of 70 denier black tights. I am also giving myself a pep talk.  The prospect of months of drizzle which will make my hair curl, grey skies, early darkness and cold shivery mornings leaves me feeling more than a bit blah. This year, Cygnet and…

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It was Virginia Wolf who said that a woman must have a room of her own if she is to write fiction.  Virginia’s statement was a Feminist one, mine, to be honest, is more practical.  I have found that I need my own personal space, a room of my own so to speak, to truly relax and to indulge in a bit of blog writing. I have been quiet on the blog front recently.  This wasn’t an intentional blogging holiday,…

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I have a confession to make –  I probably could have avoided separating from my ex.  There you go, I’ve said it.  There was more I could have done, there was more effort I could have made to keep our relationship ticking over and our marriage together.  Here are some tips to look after your husband. I don’t regret separation for a second.  My ex has a wonderful way of validating my decision to leave him every single time we meet,…

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There are times when single parenting is really tough.  Sometimes co-parenting is really tough.  Don’t get me wrong, some single parents would do anything for the other parent to be involved in their child’s upbringing, for an evening off every once in a while, to have an uninterrupted night’s sleep a couple of nights a week.  This is how to cope without your child through co-parenting milestones. No one ever said that co-parenting was going to be easy, but this…

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Motherhood changed me. I am not the first mother to have said that. But motherhood changed me in ways that I could never have predicted. As a mother, I am now acutely conscious of the world that Cygnet is growing up in. I worry about climate change and the environment. I worry about nuclear war. I worry, but my worrying will not help anyone or anything. I now feel I have a personal responsibility to make the world a better…

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