I’ve discovered that I do not like Tinder.
There is a wealth of advice out there that says that newly divorced or newly separated parents should wait to date. Dating seems like a great idea to get over your ex, but you have to take the time to be yourself for a bit, to learn to like yourself again and to be happy in your own skin.
This makes a lot of sense, but my ex, well…I am over him already, he is not for me!
I went out for dinner with my single girlfriends and my male gay friend. They are full of energy, full of laughs, full of life, and they are dating tornados. Anything they don’t know about dating is not worth knowing. They know blind dating, internet dating, speed dating, silent speed dating…yes, you read that correctly! The eyes are the window to the soul. Apparently it is much easier to have a connection with someone after two minutes of eye gazing with them. Check out http://shhhdating.com/ for more information. If you dare!
The conversation switched to Tinder. Now, for those of you who don’t know, Tinder is an online dating app. It links to your Facebook account to get your photos and advertises your location to potential matches based on some basic search criteria that you can configure. Search criteria include age range and proximity to your location at any given time. When it first appeared on the dating market it was used as a casual sex app because it finds potential matches for you based on their proximity to you. It has moved beyond that and apparently, everyone is on it.
I asked my friends whether Tinder has a single mum section. Their response was “Errr yeah! Get on it darl.” I am not sure it does have a single mum section but never mind. The only rule that all my friends follow is “no selfies”. Apparently anyone who needs to take a selfie is a social outcast. (Apologies to anyone out there on Tinder with a selfie photo. This, of course, is a totally unfounded comment from some, by now, very drunk friends.)
I signed up to Tinder and started searching for dating potential. It is a shallow app. You look at photos and swipe right if you like the look of them and left if you don’t. Simple!
I swiped right on a few of potentials. I got a few matches. Once you have a match, you have the option to send a message. I didn’t. I just waited.
And then I got this message from a match called ‘Jon’:
“I’ve got to be honest. I want you for my sex toy. Are you up for that?”
Um… I do not like Tinder.
I haven’t replied.
I do not like Tinder and I haven’t been on Tinder since.